How very early morning walk saved me…

… from going insane! or maybe it’s not over yet! At least I pushed it away for a while…

at 7 am after being awake for 3 hours… (fell asleep at midnight just to get up a few times between then and 4 am) I’d packed my camera, cup of HOT coffee and proceeded the act of leaving my place… Beautiful morning!!! A little bit chilly, it didn’t matter to me, though.

I sat down on the bench at the park. Had a few sips of coffee, took some pictures…

I was really surprised how busy the park is at 7 am… I really admire all those people walking, running, exercising so early… They’re some awesome! I’d love to get back to running, someday… or at least  walking, gym(ing)… ;-) whatever… something…

While walking I’d been thinking that if somebody told me I’m not allowed to play with my camera, and I have to stop taking pictures, and start to live without it… I would’ve killed him/her… and then myself… !!! It’s the only thing that keeps me sane… It listens to me, it does what I ask for… (sometimes I do not know how that damn thing works that’s why we experience some misunderstandings), it doesn’t cry, it doesn’t yell, eat, pee, or poop. It doesn’t make mess and it doesn’t hurt my feelings. I don’t have to speak any goddamn language to be understood. It helps me to feel better about myself when everything else let me down…  When the world around me gets sooo crazy that I can’t stand it anymore… walk and the camera – it’s all I need to get on track… to get better… to feel relieved… to smile again…

I’m So Grateful for all those People who gave me the chance to stay so creative!!! You’ve saved my life MANY MANY times since I got my last camera from you guys!!!

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13 thoughts on “How very early morning walk saved me…”

  1. Ewa, we love you!!! I am so glad you have an outlet to be creative and express yourself. It’s all YOU in that lens. What you see, how you see it, what you feel.
    Not easy being a new mom. I can only imagine what little time you have to yourself. Everyone needs that “me” time to stay sane!
    Glad you got a bit of that this morning.

    love you,
    Arline

  2. Highs…Lows…and everything in between. Most times are good, a few are great and some just suck. Photography helps me too. Looking at the beautiful things and not beautiful things and putting them on the camera puts the world in prospective for me. An outlet that keeps us somewhat sane. I am glad that we could help you to put your World in Focus, Ewa. Looking at your photos always puts a smile on my face. So glad to help someone be happy. Even though we have never met we Love ya like family.
    Your buddy, your Pal… Sam

  3. Thanks Ewa! You also have really good photos. I’m glad you went for a walk that morning, ’cause you caught a really nice light and shadows there. When I do get up that soon, it’s time to walk the dogs urgently… no time to take the camera :-(

    1. thanks Brunn!
      You know, you can always take you camera with you. Sometimes I shoot with my dog on the leash in one hand and stroller with my baby in fron of me :-)
      luckily she is a great dog and when I tell her sit, she sits down and waits for me until I tell her “ok”. and I love taking pictures of her too, she is a very pretty dog. I used to take much more pictures of her, but when my daughter was born she became the no 1 model… good that my dog is not VERY ;-) jealouse about that…
      So, next time when you walk your dogs take the camera with you. I wish to have more time to go for walks like that a few time a week… That would be soooo awesome!!!
      I’ll be following your blog to see if you took my advice ;-)
      Hugs,
      Ewa

      1. Ooh I usually take the camera, but only to the long walk, when i let them run wild, the first walk in the morning is just for the essential… you know…then we all have breakfast and only afterwards will we take the “walk on the wild side” :-) and i have to walk two.

        http://brunnus.wordpress.com/2011/01/19/love-and-hate/

        He’s Ice and she’s Ervilha.

        Have a nice weekend with baby :-)
        Bruno Oliveira

  4. Hi Ewa,

    Sorry I didn’t get a chance to look at this earlier. The past few days have been crazy here (I understand the midnight to 4 with interruptions thing as well!). I’m glad I did. Your walk really captured some beautiful pictures.

    Here, I can’t go for walks in the morning right now. Well, I could. But it’s in the single digits. The other day, though, I drove around (not very European, not very Earth loving)and caught some neat pictures on Winter on the Prairie. I have to say, you inspired my pictures actually. I only have a simple digital point & shoot but you’ve helped me think outside of the box.
    I think I understand how you feel. At least a bit. It’s hard to be a new Mom. It’s even harder to be in a new country as well. And away from your family. I’d hug you if I could, because I understand that pain. But life is still so wonderful and full of fantastic people and inspiration. And children make it better. Yes, they can be trying. But then, they look at you a certain way and it feels better.
    Hugs to you! And even though my Polish is not super, you are alway welcome to write to me in Polish, if it makes you feel better!

    1. That’s ok ! No worries! It’s beautiful what you wrote… “I inspired you”! Thank you so much!!! Don’t worry about the walks. Soon it will get warmer… It’s 45 F in here but it feels like 50ties. Amazing, beautiful weather! We bought some seeds today, and are planning to do some gardening later :-)

      You know, sometimes we all have our down days… I prefere the ups but sometimes it’s hard, as you probably know yourself.
      Sometimes I wish to had some help with my daughter, but then I feel bad that I thought about it because actually it’s not that bad – it’s only one baby, and I do not work, so I shouldn’t complaining. Right!? I have that Polish way of thinking that If I don’t work 2 jobs, have 3 kids, cook, clean, etc I’m not good enough…
      In my family every women worked, are working, and will be working hard. That’s how my mom was able to send me/my brother/my sister to college! She sometimes says something that hurts me because she thinks I’ve got such an easy life here in US. She does not do that intentionally, but still – it hurts.
      It’s always something. Isn’t it!
      Warm hugs,

  5. I understand that feeling of if you don’t have 2 jobs, 3 kids, cook, clean, etc. that it’s not good enough. I am a SAHM as well. Like my mother. But what some people don’t realize is that when you are from another country to the US, it’s harder to leave your child with strangers for things. It’s why I don’t work. I have no help either. Well, now that I live near my father, I have him but he is a man and not young anymore so I only want to ask him for help on occasion. But for a while, there was no help at all. And it can really put you down. But you are doing something amazing which most won’t ever do or know about. You are starting a new life and in a day and age where you can visit your home as well. It is always something. But we are strong Polish women and we can handle anything! And warm hugs back to you!

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